Weapons of Mass Reduction

Jennifer Hudson\'s Weight Watchers Commercial

Like 99% of the population, I’ve struggled with my weight most of my life. During my first pregnancy I went up to 225! At 5’3″ that is an extremely unhealthy weight for me. After I had my son, I went back down to 175, and over the first 4 years of his life, I went down into the 130’s.

Slowly over the next 5 years or so, I kept gaining and gaining. I experienced many deaths over that period of time (6, to be exact. Most of them close family, friends and loved ones). Let me tell you, death and grief really take it’s toll on your body and mind! So again, I gained it all back and was into the 180’s and 190’s.
After having my second son in August 2011, and staying roughly about the same weight I was before I had him, I decided over Christmas 2011 that it was time for me to take my life back once again. It was a new year, and time for a fresh start. So I joined Weight Watchers with my mom (who is a fabulous woman, and a wonderful supporter). By now, we’ve all seen the Weight Watchers commercials with Jennifer Hudson. You know, the song she sings “If you want it you’ve got it, you’ve just got to believe..” It’s so catchy!!
I had done weight watchers in the past, and though it’s a slow loss, it also happens to be the most effective. And trust me, I’ve tried them all. Atkins, SouthBeach, Dr. B, hell, I’ve even tried not eating (which is a really destructive lifestyle to live, for many reason). I guess I knew in my mind, that with Weight Watchers teaching you to eat the right portions, and the right foods (fruit and most veggies are 0 points per serving!) that it was the one for me.
Some may think “why can’t you do that on your own?”
Well, the answer is simple. I am an emotional eater. I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad. I eat when I’m bored. I eat socially. God, I swear sometimes I even eat when I’m eating!
It’s very difficult to suffer from an eating disorder of ANY kind. I know I’m not the only one out there who sits down with a quart of ice cream and can finish it off over a 12 hour period. It just tastes so damn good!
So, January 28th was the beginning of the end.
The good thing about Weight Watchers though, is that I still CAN eat ice cream if I want it to… though at 4 points per half a cup (and that’s a LEVEL half a cup), I usually opt not to. You can eat whatever you want! It’s just that you need to eat them in the right portions. The leader of the group I joined is amazing! She’s a success story using Weight Watchers too. (All leaders have to have completed their maintenance program). So she gets it. She knows how eating addictions are, and understands that our bodies fluctuate all the time. So going to the weekly meetings with her really keep me motivated to keep doing this. Keep weighing and measuring my food. Keep walking. Just keep MOVING! With a 7 month old, that’s easy to do.

You know, the first couple of weeks of attempting to lose weight are always so great. The “Honeymoon” period. You do so amazing, you measure everything. You eat your fruits and veggies.
After the honeymoon is over though, it does get a little trying. You think you know all of the measurements of your food. But over time, guessing at weights and sizes doesn’t really work the way you would hope. The portions get bigger. It really is something you need to do all the time.
So by now, I’ve lost 13 pounds in 7 weeks. I feel great (and can feel it in my clothes!) and am continuing to lose. It’s hard because sometimes I feel hungry when I know I’m bored. So I get my ass off the couch, or whatever mundane activity I’m partaking in, and drink a glass of water, or brush my teeth. If I’m still thinking about it after that, then I eat an apple or banana. Sometimes, you have to give in, and have something sweet or salty. That’s ok! Like I said before, with Weight Watchers you can eat WHATEVER you want. Seriously. Every other “diet” is just that. No carbs. No sugar. High Protein. Low Fat.
Come on! I can’t live like that. I need bread, and sugar in my coffee or tea. The protein part is ok though because I love chicken, and eggs etc.

I’ll stop chattering now and will keep you updated soon about where I am at. For now, I’m feeling healthy and good, though that changes sometimes. Here is a funny weight-loss kind of joke, that I had a good laugh about. I think you will too! Enjoy 🙂

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious Health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. “Guaranteed. Yeah right!” he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.

The next day there’s a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, “If you can catch me, you can have me!” Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, Huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, “I like the way this company does business!” The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens. On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10lb. as promsed.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/ 20 pound program. The next day there’s a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, “If you catch me, you can have me.” He’s out the door or after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs.as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50

Pound program. “Are you sure?” asks the representative on the phone. “This is our most rigorous program.” Absolutely,” he replies, “I haven’t felt this good in years”. The next day there’s a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a muscular guy standing here wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, “If I catch you, you’re mine.”

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1 Response to Weapons of Mass Reduction

  1. Yay Lisa! Glad to see your are writing. Keep it up sweetheart! Good Read!

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